


Dead Man Walking

by InsaneAndHappyAboutIt



Series: Self-Destructive [6]
Category: Sons of Anarchy
Genre: Angst, Bloody, M/M, Mindbreak, Power Play, Smut, Triggers, Violent
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-08
Updated: 2018-03-08
Packaged: 2019-03-28 19:28:13
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,623
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13910622
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/InsaneAndHappyAboutIt/pseuds/InsaneAndHappyAboutIt
Summary: Takes place at the end of S7E6!!!"‘Jesus Christ… Jesus fucking Christ.’ He should have been kind enough to kill the lad when he had the chance. Fuck load of good regret did either of them now…"





	Dead Man Walking

**Author's Note:**

> Seriously, this is not for the faint hearted!! I don't think it's as bad as Drowning Rat but it's still pretty dicey... You've been warned!

Juice felt like he was suffocating in the tiny, dark room. There were no windows and only one way out which was definitely guarded. The Sons finally had him in their grasp and there was no way Jax would give him an opening to make another run for it. But really, come to think of it, did he even want to run? He was tired to the bone and he had nowhere to go. Coming to Alvarez had been a bold move or had it been a dumb one? He knew his chances of reaching Mexico were just a smidgen above zero but he’d taken his chances anyway. At the risk of going all shrinky on his own ass, he probably wanted to be caught.

He was never going to sell club secrets to the Mayans. If his bluff was called he would have just fed them a bunch of bullshit which he could make sound believable but he wasn’t far enough gone to align himself with the Mayans. He’d lost count of the number of bullets those assholes fired at him. He did respect Alvarez for his loyalty though. He’d rightly suspected the man would trade him off to Jax because there was little reason to think he was worth the trouble of being shipped past the border. What would he do in Mexico anyway? Start selling tacos? Nah, Juice only went through all this trouble to save some face. He didn’t want to be caught with his tail between his legs and he didn’t want to keep running so this seemed like the next logical option.

Seeing the members again though, that had been rough. He was used to the disgust in Jax’s eyes since the MC president was perfectly aware of the scummy depth into which he’d sunk but the others? Juice doubted he’d ever felt like a bigger waste of breath in his sorry ass life. Of course the worst to face was Chibs but he’d steeled himself for the pain in advance. This was his last attempt to buy some grace though he feared he would never be seen as a real brother again. That was the thing about trust. It was a bitch to earn and once lost it was impossible to get back. It was a total shot in the dark but if Jax still saw some potential in him he would use Juice and if not, he would be dead before the hour was up. Win, win really…

Now they stuck him in this cupboard, because it couldn’t be called a room by any stretch of the imagination, while Alvarez and Jax squared things out. Juice wondered briefly what he was worth and immediately knew his ass was free. Jax wouldn’t bother trading anything of importance for a traitor and Alvarez was smart enough to anticipate that. Juice was out of the loop so he didn’t know what SAMCRO’s been up to lately but he felt the tension as soon as he saw the members. They were all on edge and he would be a gift from Alvarez to Jax meant to solidify the trust bond between the two gangs. Alvarez could have just as easily packed him off to SAMCRO in pieces so he supposed he was grateful for every breath he still drew in, for however long that still happened…

It really amazed him how wrong he’d been when he’d thought he had nothing left to lose in the past. Now he really and truly had nothing left. He’d lost the club, then Jax’s trust, then Chibs turned his back on him and now Gemma too? His heart was still struggling to reconcile with the image of Gemma driving him off to the middle of nowhere to kill him. Fuck, that was messed up. After all he’d done for her, the secrets he’d kept, the position he’d put himself in, that’s how she repaid him? A heavy pill to swallow indeed… This last hoorah was everything he had left and if it didn’t happen then he’d finally get to rest at least. He was little more than a dead man walking.

Juice caught the sound of booths approaching, at least two sets, and stood perfectly straight, waiting for Jax’s verdict. It came to his attention that the warehouse was deadly quiet. He’d been too caught up in his own thoughts to notice the absence of members chattering and bartering as they carved up territories and made underhanded deals. So the club voted for Mayhem after all then. Alvarez and his guys probably gave the MC space to deal with Juice. He wondered if they’d take the time to bury him or if they’d just leave his corpse off somewhere by the side of the highway. It would be a fitting end and maybe he could even be of some use to a vulture or two.

The door opened and Juice met Jax’s glare square on. It wasn’t out of defiance or to prove something. He just wanted to hold onto the last fragment of his dignity before Jax killed him. Was that too much to hope for? He glanced at the other biker walking in after Jax and his eyes darted away to burn a hole in the wall. Why did it have to be Chibs? Serendipity was a right bitch. Juice wished the Scotsman had been kind enough to shoot him at the diner, in that bathroom stall, or that he’d been brave enough to do the deed himself but he was too much of a pussy. He hadn’t lied when he’d told Unser why he kept running despite having no destination and no reason to drag his sorry ass around. He was too much of a coward to do anything else. Admitting that was perhaps the most honest he’d ever been.

‘Wait outside Chibs. Wait by the door in case I need you.’ Juice let out a relieved breath, hoping the immense gratitude didn’t show too strongly on his face. He didn’t want Chibs to see him get killed, not if Jax was holding the gun. He glanced at the man who didn’t let any emotion bleed into his steady gaze. If he’d been looking for mercy he wouldn’t find any there.

‘Aye.’ Jax pulled out his gun and Juice waited for it to find its mark but instead of pointing in his direction Jax handed it to Chibs. The gears in Juice’s mind started spinning and whatever peace he’d made with his end crumbled. This wasn’t an execution. It was a power play meant to test Chibs’ resolve. Juice felt the hairs on the back of his neck raise and he looked from one man to the other, weariness shrinking his heart to a dot. ‘I wash my hands clean of him.’

Juice couldn’t help the strangled laugh clawing out of his throat. Yet again he found something else to lose. He didn’t call out to Chibs, though he yearned to, as the man turned his back on him. The door closed with a resounding bang, far too loud in the tiny room and he was left alone with Jax. The two must have talked before coming to him and reached some sort of agreement. This felt rehearsed. Juice didn’t have any allusions about Jax being in the dark about his and Chibs’ relationship. Relationship? Well it didn’t matter what he called it anymore. Whatever it had been it was about to be razed to the ground.

Juice closed his eyes, waiting for the hits to shower down on him and when the first punch made contact with his cheek he was send sprawling against a nearby shelf, sending buckets of pain splattering all over the concrete floor. He shakily righted himself again and the second punch had him crashing against the other wall. Jax was putting his back into the blows and if he kept going Juice would be lucky to get away with a broken jaw. He stood up on unsteady legs and Jax grabbed his shirt, turning him and hurling him against the door. He did it again and again until Juice’s head was swimming, his skull screaming from multiple sources of pain. His eyes were rolled back as his head fell forward, blood streaming down his chin from his busted nose but Jax didn’t let him off that easily. A well delivered hit to his solar plexus had him doubling over, gasping for breath. Juice didn’t cry out though. He ground his teeth and accepted each punch and kick because he knew he deserved everything Jax threw at him.

Physical pain he could manage. He’d become quite adept at it and his lips curved into a small smile, showing his bloodied teeth. Jax looked at him, his expression indiscernible, but Juice couldn’t be surprised anymore. Rather than being thrown against the door again he went to it willingly, turning his back on Jax. The loss of blood and, what he correctly assumed was a concussion, blurred his vision but didn’t dull his senses any. He spit out blood as his jeans were pushed down and ran his tongue over each tooth, making sure they were all there. One canine felt a little loose but it was probably just his imagination. The salty, bitter taste of blood coated his tongue and he focused on the iron under-taste to take his mind off what Jax was doing.

Juice hadn’t been prepared for this and he didn’t think Jax would be courteous enough to stretch him. Fortunately it wasn’t the first time he’d been fucked dry but it was still one of those experiences that never got easier no matter how many times they happened. Jax’s cock was thick, thick enough to cause considerable agony as it thrust inside his far too tight hole. Juice strained to hold back the yell but it stubbornly forced its way out of his mouth. Something wet and warm trickled down his thigh and he knew it was blood. Jax’s brutal attack was tearing him up, quite literally, and the sting was excruciating.

Juice’s breath was laboured and he pressed his forehead against the painted wood, knowing Chibs was on the other side and hearing every sound he made but taking no comfort at the thought. He smelled smoke and recognized Chibs’ chosen brand of cigarettes. At least Jax had the good grace to let Chibs wait outside. Juice didn’t know if he was strong enough to survive had Chibs been in the room with them, witnessing Jax fuck him bloody. Each push was worse than before, more of him falling apart despite his futile attempts to keep it together. Funny, he hadn’t thought he still had tears left to cry but here they were, mixing with the still flowing blood to drip on the floor. The Mayans wouldn’t be happy with the mess but Juice doubted Jax gave a shit.

He refused to call Chibs’ name out loud but he couldn’t stop repeating the word over and over inside his head like a mantra. It was the only grain of order in the chaos surrounding him. Jax grabbed the back of his neck, nails leaving their bite into his skin and Juice could see the end in sight. It was almost over. He didn’t know what Jax had planned for him next but whatever it was he couldn’t count on Chibs to speak on his behalf, that much was painfully evident. He tried to imagine the face Chibs was making on the other side of the door as he listened to Juice being brutally raped by his leader but all he could conjure up was the cold, distant eyes looking right through him. Juice might as well be dead already, that’s what those eyes said.

Jax came violently and Juice’s insides squirmed at the burning sensation. It didn’t repulse him or please him. He was dead inside and numb and another crazy cackle punctured the silence. There was nothing more dangerous in this world than a man who had nothing left to lose, especially when that man’s weak grasp on sanity was slipping. Juice was that man so whatever Jax had in store for him he’d do it. It wasn’t like he had any scruples left. Morality? Ha! Now that was a funny joke!

Jax let him fall in a heap, watching him with icy blue eyes as he dragged himself against the wall. The tears stopped flowing or maybe he just finally ran out. The world around him faded out of focus, his eyes staring but not seeing. Juice was vaguely aware of the door opening and Chibs entering. He didn’t have the strength or heart to look at the man. The previously spilled paint was cold against his skin. It was black. Fitting.

‘Jesus Christ…’ Chibs swallowed audibly at the sorry sight. Had Juice looked up then he would have seen the pity which Chibs had so expertly disguised with hate before.

‘He’ll live. We still need him to take care of Lin. We’ll plant him in the joint and give him his chance to redeem himself. Maybe he still has hope of going out like a man.’ Juice barely heard the words and those he did made little sense. It was all the same anyway. Jax would tell him what to do and he would do it. It was that simple…

‘What about him now? He looks half dead. Maybe you overdid it Jacky?’ Jax raised an eyebrow at Chibs’ question. He wasn’t an idiot. Chibs thought he was hiding it well but he saw the sympathy and he knew it made him weak when it came to matters regarding Juice. If this last attempt to sever the link between the two of them completely didn’t work then Jax doubted anything ever would. If Chibs still held some sentiment of love towards Juice then he truly pitied the man. He didn’t want that sort of torture on his worst enemy’s pet, certainly not on his VP.

‘Maybe I did. We’ll give him some time to recover while the guys get back. I’m gonna go take care of some family business. You can do what you want. Leave him here if you want or patch him up. It’s up to you. I won’t ask any questions.’

Chibs nodded, his head moving with difficulty as if the bones in his neck were rusty. His eyes didn’t leave Juice’s collapsed form as Jax walked past him. He ran a hand through his hair, weighing his options. On one hand he had no reason to help out the rat and he understood why Jax did what he’d done. As unorthodox as his methods had been, Jax meant to help him cut Juice loose. Damn his idiotic bleeding heart! On the other hand this was an extreme level of abuse which was meant to break Juice in body and mind. Jax’s personal beef with the excommunicated member obviously shone through. Chibs knew for a fact he wouldn’t have shoved his cock up any other traitor’s ass.

‘Jesus Christ… Why the fuck didn’t you do what I told you to do Juicy? One bullet would have been better than this.’ Chibs sighed and bent to pick up the limp body. Juice groaned in his arms, barely hanging onto consciousness as Chibs dragged him out of the room to somewhere he could lay him down. He would patch him up as best he could, if only to stop the other members from asking the wrong questions. ‘Jesus Christ…. Jesus fucking Christ.’ He should have been kind enough to kill the lad when he had the chance. Fuck load of good regret did either of them now…

**Author's Note:**

> I hope it was an enjoyable read and let me know if you have any thoughts in the comments section below! 
> 
> Have a great day!! XD


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